Do this; don’t do that!
Don’t do this! Don’t do that! Behave in this way! Or that!
Almost every person is advising another, for every matter on hand, almost everywhere one goes. Whether in the house, or outside - including at the workplace, or entertainment kiosks, or those institutions, such as schools, colleges and temples, that are built for this purpose alone - the constant bombardment of advice continues. Some try to incorporate the advice given to them, but sometimes fail so completely that they then begin to advise others. This triggers a chain reaction that grips every person instantly, and insanely so. Ultimately it resembles a contagious disease.
A person is supposed to follow traffic rules, guidelines for admission into institutions, and other similar rules, for smooth functioning of day-to-day life. However, an advice should not be followed like a rule. One must learn through his freewill and experimentation. The joy of an experience is broken, if interrupted by someone’s advice. For example, you may be enjoying a beautiful piece of music under the open skies, when your parents advice you to come inside the house, lest you catch a cold; or, ask you to stop wasting your time and focus on getting a better score instead. Nothing would have been lost in those few moments of ecstasy, except the beauty of the experience, crippled by the advice.
It is this kind of unsolicited advice that irks the most. The view of the advisor is based on his personal experience, and may cause a negative outlook. The advice is not as much responsible for creating a perception, than the advisor himself. The relevancy of any suggestion, based on experience, is dependant upon the similarity of circumstance.
Often, the ones meting out unsolicited advice are the people who are actually seeking to improve their own lives; they have utterly failed in the areas on which they dole out advice. For example, a person whose children are completely out of control, will often give tips on good parenting; the most selfish and cruel people will talk about philanthropy, religion and compassion; an uneducated person will stress on the importance of higher education, so on and forth.
A practical person, once aware of his shortcomings, will use his rational thinking to overcome them. However, this is not the case for most people, as they try to cover their faults instead, turning it into an ego fulfilling exercise. So when a thief extols the virtue of honesty; he cannot be trusted, nor can his advice be taken seriously.
It is important to filter any advice that you receive. The mind grasps faster than the brain, so perception can affect experience. Perceptions are individualistic in nature and cannot be copied. If someone tries to impose a perception on you, it will confuse you and make you feel uncomfortable. Thus, it is important to think, before accepting any advice at its face value.
Unsolicited advice is not always bad, depending from whom it is coming. However, it is typically annoying when someone comments on our life, unwarranted. The solution lies in handling such advice tactfully. Acceptance is the key. Accept the words of wisdom, and process them rationally in your brain, without being influenced by the relationship you share with the advisor.
Maintaining a positive attitude will also go a long way in handling unwanted advice. One must live life as it comes, relishing each and every moment. Such positivity will help you manage not only unnecessary advice, but also help you take criticism encouragingly. After all, it is your own responsibility to make your life an eternal celebration.
© Vikash Kumar 2015